Forgive and Forget o.0

Well my bro talked to me on Saturday night... from 11pm to 1am. BAHHHHH.
About how we should have trust between us...
And I'm yawning away.
And he says I don't treasure our relationship.
Which I hell do not.
Jackpot! =)
Geez 14 years of torture, and 1 year of him changing himself, I should forgive him?
Okie I'm a revengeful person.
I remember the bad stuff he did. o.0 But my mum remembers more bad stuff he did to me than I remember.
He's a saintly being who doesn't remember what bad stuff I did.
And I have misunderstood him. He has been doing stuff for me behind my back. And he needs no recognition what so ever.
At first I was quite vengeful... whenever he squashed me I would get really pissed and whacked him. Well he said it hurts and he's been allowing himself to get hit. Bleah I shouldn't be so direct. I need to train a whole lot more before I get stronger than him.
Tell him he's weak. Pathetic.
That was what I thought last time. But I wonder, after that, I just thought that revenge is useless... What's the point of repeating it... But it's been a tremendous driving force for the longest time.
Hmph, I don't feel anything towards my brother now. He's a... playmate. yarh. No feelings. If he gets into trouble I'll probably help him like a normal acquaintance. But that's enough. I put down revenge. How much more can I give? Trusting him fully is like a damn self-destruct button... Which I have trampled on many a times.
I'm dramatizing things I think. heh.
So long.